1022. The witty and licentious Earl of Rochester meeting with the great Isaac Barrow in the park, told his companions that he would have some fun with the rusty old put. Accordingly, he went up with great gravity, and, taking off his hat, made the doctor a profound bow, saying, Doctor, I am yours to my shoe-tie. The doctor, seeing his drift, immediately pulled off his beaver, and returned the bow, with My lord, I am yours to the ground. Rochester followed up his salutation by a deeper bow, saying, Doctor, I am yours to the centre. Barrow, with a lowly obeisance, replied, My lord, I am yours to the Antipodes. His lordship, nearly gravelled, exclaimed, Doctor, I am yours to the lowest pit of hell. There, my lord, said Barrow, sarcastically, I leave you; and walked off.
1023. The following anecdote is related of the great Duke of Marlborough. The duchess was pressing the duke to take a medicine; and, with her usual warmth, said, I’ll be hanged if it do not prove serviceable. Dr. Garth, who was present, exclaimed, Do take it then, my lord duke; for it must be of service, in one way or the other.
1024. Cardinal de Bernis, when only an Abbé, solicited Cardinal Fleury, then fourscore, for some preferment. Fleury told him fairly, he should never have anything in his time. Bernis replied, _Monseigneur, j’attendrai_ [My lord, I shall wait].
1025. Mr. Suckling, a clergyman of Norfolk, having a quarrel with a neighbouring gentleman, who insulted him, and at last told him, his gown was his protection. The doctor replied, It may be mine, but it shall not be yours; and pulling it off, thrashed the aggressor.
1026. In some parish churches it was the custom to separate the men from the women. A clergyman, being interrupted by loud talking, stopped short, when a woman, eager for the honour of the sex, arose and said, Your reverence, it is not among us. So much the better, answered the priest; it will be over the sooner.
1027. The evening before a battle, an officer came to ask Marshal Toiras for permission to go and see his father, who was at the point of death. Go, said the general, who saw through the pretext; thou shalt honour thy father and thy mother, that thy days may be long upon the earth.