However boorish and brusque strangers may dub us, it is admitted on all hands that the Yorkshireman is fairly ’cute: he always has an eye to the main chance. And although others who are glibber of tongue may to a certain extent fairly ’mazzle’ him with their verbosity, yet any such may certainly claim to having done the ’hat trick’ if in the end they manage to outwit the Tyke. ‘He ommaist ’wildered ma wiv his slather, bud Ah pairted wi’ nowt,’ said an old man who had been tackled by a book agent.
‘Did ta bet owt at t’ races?’ asked one Tyke of another. ‘Neea, Ah didn’t. It war leyke this, thoo knaws. T’ chaps ’at Ah seed stanning o’ t’ top o’ steeals an’ sitting unner gert um’erellas all seeam’d ti ’ev gawd rings an’ cheeans on, an’ tha war varra weel dhriss’d an’ all, whahl monny ov ’em ’at war ’livering ther brass up war oot at t’ teeas an’ doon at t’ heels. Seea Ah sed tiv mysen, “T’ steeal an’ t’ um’erella chaps leeak ez if tha war ’evving t’ best o’ t’ bargain all t’ waay thruff,’ an’ seea neean on ’em gat onny o’ mah brass. Dizn’t ta think ’at Ah war i’ t’ reet on ’t?”
Cautiousness and ’cuteness is fairly well set forth in the following story. Old Jobson wished to gain some legal information, ‘bud he didn’t want ti pay owt for ’t.’ Meeting the legal light one day, he began, ‘Ah saay, if Ah wor ti ax ya summat aboot summat, s’u’d Ah ’a’e ti pay summat? It’s aboot yon pathwaay o’ mahn ’at Ah want ti knaw summat.’ ‘Certainly; I don’t give advice free,’ replied the lawyer. ‘Whya then, Ah weean’t ax ya nowt; things may bahd ez they are, whahl yow want a larl piece o’ knowledge fra me, an’ then wa’ll see if wa caan’t mak a swap on’t. Nowther t’ field na t’ path’ll shift,’ said Jobson as he walked away. And so matters rested for some months, in fact until the lawyer’s horse (a very valuable one) was suddenly taken ill. Jobson was at once sent for, he being an expert in all horse ailments. The old farmer, after a careful examination of his patient, declared he knew what was amiss and what was needed to effect a cure. ‘Then I will send my man for what you need at once,’ said the owner.
‘Aye, bud wait a bit; deean’t ya aim ’at tahm’s cum’d when wa s’all ’a’e ti swap wer knowledge?’ said the farmer, with a twinkle in his eye. The solicitor burst out laughing; he saw the joke and admitted the validity of the claim. The old chap saved the horse, and the pathway was satisfactorily arranged.