It was a heart-shaped monument, inscribed, "Near this place lieth Edward Bird, Esq., Gent. Dyed the 23rd of February, 1718/9. His age 26," and was surmounted by a half-length portrait effigy of him in armour, with a full flowing wig; a truncheon in his right hand, and in the background a number of military trophies.
The especial scandal attaching to the fact of this monument ever having been placed in the church arises from the fact that Edward Bird was hanged for murder. Some particulars are gleaned from one of the many catchpenny leaflets issued at the time by the Ordinary--that is to say, the Chaplain--of Newgate, who was never averse from adding to his official salary by writing the "last dying words" of interesting criminals; but his flaring front pages were, at the best--like the contents bills of modern sensational evening newspapers--indifferent honest, and his account of Bird is meagre.
It seems, collating this and other authorities, that this interesting young man had been given the advantages of "a Christian and Gentlemanlike Education," which in this case means that he had been a Westminster boy under the renowned Dr. Busby, and afterwards a scholar at Eton. This finished Christian then became a lieutenant in the Marquis of Winchester's Horse. He married when twenty years of age, and his wife died a year later, when he plunged into a dissolute life in London.
One evening in September, 1718, he was driven "with a woman in a coach and a bottle of Champain wine" to a "bagnio" in Silver Street, Golden Square, and there "had the misfortune" to run a waiter, one Samuel Loxton, through the body with his sword. "G--d d--n you, I will murder you all," he is reported to have threatened, and a farrier of Putney, called at the subsequent trial, deposed to having once been run through the body by this martial spirit.
Greatly to the surprise of himself and friends, Lieutenant Bird was not only arrested and tried, but found guilty and sentenced to death. The historian of these things is surprised, too; for gentlemen of fashion were in those times very much what German officers became--privileged murderers--and waiters were earthworms. I cannot understand it at all.
At any rate, Edward Bird took it ill and declined the ministrations of the Ordinary, saying "He was very busy, was to write Letters, expected Company, and such-like frivolous Excuses." The Ordinary does not tell us in so many words, but we may suspect that the condemned man told him to go to the Devil. He was, indeed, an altogether hardened sinner, and would not even go to chapel, and was so poor a sportsman that he tried to do the rabble of Tyburn out of the entertaining spectacle of his execution, taking poison and stabbing himself in several places on the eve of that interesting event.