_Young Hawkins (finding young Mr. Merton, the model of his office, in an unexpected haunt)_. "HULLO, MERTON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? HAVE A SHERRY AND BITTERS?"
_Young Merton_. "NO, THANK YOU, HAWKINS; I'M AFRAID IT WOULD GO TO MY HEAD."
_Hawkins_. "SO MUCH THE BETTER, OLD MAN. NATURE ABHORS A VACUUM. YOU KNOW."]
"Sling me over a two-eyed steak, BILL," said BOBO.
BILL complied instantly, for he knew the lady's style of conversation; but Lord COKALEEK required to be told that his Marchioness was asking for one of the bloaters in the silver dish in front of his cousin, BILL SPLINTER.
Now, dear reader, I 'm not going to describe Cokaleek House, in the black country, or COKALEEK, or BOBO, or BILL. If you are in smart society you know all about them beforehand; and if you ain't you must puzzle them out the best way you can. The more I don't describe them the more vivid and alive they ought to seem to you. As for BOBO, I shall let her talk. That's enough. In the course of my two volumes--one thick and one thin--which is a new departure, and looks as if my publisher thought that BOBO would stretch to three volumes, and then found she wouldn't--you will be told, 1, that BOBO had brown eyes; 2, that she was five foot eight; and that is all you 'll ever know about the outside of BOBO. But you'll hear her talk, and you'll see her smoke; and if you can't evolve a fascinating personality out of cigarettes, and swears, and skittish conversation, you are not worthy to have known BOBO.
I am told that some people have taken "BOBO" for a vulgar caricature of a real personage. If they have, I can only say I feel flattered by the notion, as it may serve to differentiate me from the vulgar herd of novelists who draw on their imagination for their characters.
"Why the beast has a hard roe!" she cried. "COKALEEK, you shall have the roe;" and she dropped it into his tea before he could object. "You're not eating any breakfast. Put the mustard-spoon in his mouth, BILL, if he insists upon keeping it wide open while he stares at me. Ain't I fascinating this morning? Why the devil don't you notice the new feather in my hat? I always wear feathers when I'm going out clubbing, because I plume myself upon being smart. Here, somebody see if my spur's screwed on all right."