Cousin Fanny Hemlock _is a dried-up, querulous old woman of seventy._
_The Curtain, on rising, discovers the two_ Johns _and the two_ Marys. _It is between 7 and 8 in the evening; they are all in evening dress, and are preparing to go out, putting on their gloves, etc., etc._
Mary Speaker [_Holding out a gloved hand._]
Quite, John dear. Button this for me, won't you, love?
It's been nearly a year, hasn't it, since we've been out together of an evening? I'm afraid Cousin Fanny is terribly trying on you at times, Mary.
You know, John, I don't consider her a trial. I _love_ Cousin Fanny.
The old cat's letting us off to-night, for a wonder, Mary. She's a horrible affliction!
Affliction is no word. She makes my life a living hell! I hate her!
[_Helping Mary Speaker on with coat, which action is simultaneously imitated hy John and Mary Thinker._]
Well, we must bear with her gently, Mary. I am afraid poor Cousin Fanny will not be with us many more years.
Oh, John, you don't think Cousin Fanny's going to die, do you?
Don't fool yourself about her dying soon, John. There's no such luck!
[_Enter Maid through door in right back to John and Mary Speaker, who look up. John and Mary Thinker also notice entrance of Maid and listen._]
Miss Hemlock sent me to inquire whether you were going out to-night.
Mary Thinker [_To John Thinker, quickly._]
Yes. We were just starting. Does Miss Hemlock want anything? I will go to her if she wishes to speak with me.
She said, in case you were going out, that I was to tell you _not_ to do so.
Yes, ma'am; that's what she said. She said in case you were getting ready to go out, you were to change your plans and stop at home.
Not to do so? But, surely, there must be some mistake!
[_Maid shakes her head slowly, deliberately, looking fixedly at John Speaker; and while she is doing so John Thinker says to Mary Thinker_:]
Some malicious idea is working in her head tonight!
No, sir, no mistake. She said very plainly and distinctly that you were not to go out tonight.
Cousin Fanny is not so well to-night, I'm afraid, dear, or she would certainly have put her request in some other way.
If I didn't love Cousin Fanny, John, I would be tempted to believe that she deliberately tries at times to annoy us.