If a creature he takes who in muslin would shine, Poor Solomon must on a red-herring dine; To buy her fine clothes, and rich tippets of scarlet, And dress the poor beggar in garbs of a harlot.
If willing with good cheerful neighbours to spend, Or a convivial hour with some gay social friend; To Bo----m’s would go, and therein not to be check’d, Let him shun the hard fate of a husband hen-peck’d.
If he wish not to labour with want and disgrace, Nor to answer demands which will fly in his face, Nor would open his purse for the debts of another, Let him think in due time of the case of Poll’s brother.
If children he’d have, with free use of their frame, Let him not take a part’ner stiff-jointed and lame; But let him look out for some wholesome clean girl, And escape from the clutches of shameful Poll E----.
_The following ANSWER was handed about at Berwick upon Tweed and the neighbouring Villages._
Ah! pen, ink, and paper, proves pleasing, To pirates who plunder the fame Of females, by lewdness and teasing, Too naughty and nauseous to name.
A rector, more rude than the rabble, Compos’d an incendiary song, More base than a Billingsgate bauble, And like his stale strumpet stinks strong.
That seat on a summit for cent’ries Assigned to sages and saints, Was kept by those scripture comment’ries From tete-a-tete, tarnish, and taints.
But time tells a tragical story, Of truths well attested by some; The term has turn’d out transitory, That bulwarks a brothel become.
The mansion (I need not to mention) Affords an affectionate feast, To vassals of vicious invention, A pander, two punks, and a priest.
Their pastimes and sports are pollution, Each minx is unmarry’d--each man Prefers to his spouse prostitution Upon a ’postolical plan.
By priestcraft the pulpit’s perverted, The parson’s deprav’d and impure; With projects profane preconcerted, A leacherous lout to allure.
Each cuddles his coney or rabbit, And pleasantly purr with puss-cats; Hence with husky harlots cohabit, And handle a herdling’s old hats.
When pregnant, the spinster’s exported Till she spawn her spurious sprouts, Hence home with due caution escorted To free the fecundine from flouts.
At Alnwick, this pious imposter And Betty have boarded their brats; Where they keep a female to foster Their moppets, and Matthew’s pit-rats.