UPON the Ice, 'tis nice to glide, A merry maiden by your side! The air is keen, the day is fine, You think the sport is most divine, When skimming o'er the frozen tide.
To Miss Chinchilla you confide, How proud you are to be her guide; Then try to cut some quaint design Upon the Ice.
With measured motion, rhythmic stride, You put on speed and put on side: You cut the figures Eight and Nine-- And sometimes on your back recline! Such falls will sometimes come to pride, Upon the Ice.
SAINT VALENTINE! The post is late! No letters come--'tis long past Eight! But on this bright auspicious day Frivolity holds laughing sway, And sober people have to wait!
The burdened postmen moan their fate, This Festival they reprobate; And often think they'd like to flay Saint Valentine!
But in these views you'll find Miss Kate Does not at all participate; And Beryl, Baby, Minnie, May, With Gertie, Ethel, Lily, Fay, Right gleefully commemorate-- Saint Valentine!
O WIND of March! O biting breeze! It nips the nose and nips the trees; It whirls with fury down the street, It makes us flee in quick retreat, And gives us cold and makes us sneeze!
It makes us cough and choke and wheeze, With painful back and aching knees; With dire discomfort 'tis replete, O Wind of March!
Our hands we're glad enough to squeeze, In cuffs and muffs and muffatees; 'Tis charged with blinding, cutting sleet, It spoils our temper, chills our feet, And brings the Doctor lots of fees-- O Wind of March!
AN April Day, so fresh and bright-- (_'Twill rain, I'm sure, before the night!_) We've done with Winter blasts unkind-- (_Don't leave your mackintosh behind, 'Twould be a fatal oversight!_)
In Spring-like garb we'll go bedight-- (_'Tis sure to rain, just out of spite! And most perplexing you will find, An April Day!_)
The sky is blue, the clouds are light-- (_I trust your Gamp is water-tight!_) To sing and laugh we feel inclined-- (_Here comes a storm of rain and wind! And hail, that's quite enough to blight, An April Day!_)
A PRIVATE View? 'Tis plain to you, 'Tis neither "private" nor a "view"! And yet for tickets people rush, To mingle in the well-dressed crush, And come and wonder who is who.
The beauties, poets, actors, too, With patrons, painters--not a few, Are elements that help to flush A Private View.