Eastward Hoe or Eastward Ho! is an early Jacobean-era stage play written by George Chapman, Ben Jonson and John Marston. The play was first performed at the Blackfriars Theatre by a company of boy actors known as the Children of the Queen's Revels in early August 1605, and it was printed in September the same year.

Eastward Ho! is a citizen or city comedy about Touchstone, a London goldsmith, and his two apprentices, Quicksilver and Golding. The play is highly satirical about social customs in early modern London, and its anti-Scottish satire resulted in a notorious scandal in which King James was offended and the play's authors were imprisoned. Eastward Ho! also references, even parodies, popular plays performed by adult companies such as The Spanish Tragedy, Tamburlaine and Hamlet. The play's title alludes to Westward Ho! by Thomas Dekker and John Webster who also wrote Northward Ho! in response that year.

Eastward Hoe

Characters

Touchstone, a goldsmith of Cheapside

Mistress Touchstone, his wife, a gentlewoman

Gertude, his elder daughter

Mildred, his younger daughter

Francis Quicksilver, his prodigal apprentice

Golding, his dutiful apprentice

Sindefy, Quicksilver's lover, later employed as Gertrude's maid

Sir Petronel Flash, a 'thirty pound' knight, engaged to Gertrude

Captain Seagull, a ship's captain employed by Petronel to Virginia

Spendall and Scapethrift, adventurers with Captain Seagull

Drawer, of the Blue Tavern in Billingsgate

Security, an elderly usurer; bawd to Quicksilver

Winifred, Security's young wife

Bramble, a lawyer

Scrivener

Poldavy, a tailor

Bettrice, a lady's maid

Mistress Fond and Mistress Gazer, city women

Coachman, to Gertrude

Hamlet, footman to Gertrude

Potkin, a tankard bearer

First Gentleman and Second Gentleman, at the Isle of Dogs

Wolf, the keeper of the Counter, a prison

Slitgut, a butcher's apprentice

Holdfast, a prison guard

Friend, of the prisoners

First Prisoner, Second Prisoner (Toby) Page, Messenger, Constable, and Officers

Eastward Hoe

Synopsis

Act 1

William Touchstone, a London goldsmith, chastises his apprentice Francis "Frank" Quicksilver for his laziness and prodigality. Concerned with his reputation, he tells Quicksilver to consider his actions with the catchphrase, "Work upon that now!" (1.1.10-1). Touchstone also warns Quicksilver against dishonest business and bad company, but Quicksilver remains dismissive and defensive about his way of life. Contrastingly, Touchstone's second apprentice, Golding, is industrious and temperate. Touchstone expresses his great admiration for Golding's uprightness and hopes that Golding will marry Mildred, his mild and modest daughter.

Eastward Hoe

Touchstone's second daughter, Gertrude, is engaged to the fraudulent Sir Petronel Flash, a knight who possesses a title but is bankrupt. Unlike her sister, Gertrude is vain and lascivious, preoccupied with opulent fashion and advancing her social status by marrying Petronel. After reluctantly granting Gertude's inheritance, Touchstone heartily gives Golding permission to marry Mildred. Anticipating a successful match, Touchstone praises the engaged couple for their virtues.

Act 2

The morning after Gertude and Petronel's costly wedding, Touchstone breaks Quicksilver's apprenticeship and dismisses him for his shameful gluttony and drunkenness. Unperturbed, Quicksilver mocks Touchstone and asserts that he will spend his new freedom going "eastward ho!” (2.1.100-2). Touchstone promotes his new son-in-law, Golding, to a member of the guild.

Quicksilver meets with Security, an old usurer and pander who is married to a young woman named Winifred. Quicksilver devises how he will climb the social ladder and get wealthy without inconvenience or labor. Petronel arrives and expresses his desire to leave London, especially since he cannot tolerate Gertrude or her expensive tastes. He confesses that "all the castles I have are built with air" (2.3.7). Quicksilver persuades Petronel to use Gertrude's dowry to fund their voyage to Virginia.