“We don’t want Vinegar made no female doctor!” Figger Bush squeaked.
“We don’t make him no female doctor,” Green explained patiently. “We makes him a D.D.--a Doctor of Dervinity.”
“Is you one of dem things you mentions?” Pap Curtain, a tall, yellow negro, asked in a snarling voice.
“Naw, suh, I ain’t no preacher. I’s wid a kawlidge. Therefo’ I’s a D.V.”
“Is dar any more D.D.’s in dis town?” Pap asked.
“Dar ain’t but one an’ he’s white,” Green replied. “His name is Revun Dr. Sentelle, D.D.”
“Dar now!” Pap Curtain exclaimed exultantly. “I think I ketch on. Dis here female kawlidge wants to fix Vinegar up like Revun Sentelle--make him sound dis way: De Revun Dr. Vinegar Atts, D.D. Is dat de notion?”
“Yes, suh,” Green grinned. “Dat’s a bird’s-eye view!”
Pap ran his hand into his capacious pocket and brought forth a silver dollar. He dropped it with a loud thump beside Skeeter’s money on the altar.
“I favors it, nigger. Less gib Vinegar all de frills!”
Hitch Diamond hastened to contribute his dollar, and Vinegar Atts followed him with two dollars.
“I’s willing’ to pay mo’ dan anybody fer whut I gits fer myse’f,” he announced happily.
Figger Bush walked forward and laid down fifty cents.
“I ain’t no scholard, brudders,” he said apologetically. “I don’t see more’n four bits wuth of good dat I’ll git outen dem D’s.”
One by one the members of the lodge advanced and contributed their bit to this honorary degree to be bestowed upon their chaplain. But silver dollars were scarce in the crowd, and fifty-cent pieces were soon exhausted and two-bit contributions were scanty and then dimes and nickels made up the rest of the pile.
“Ef eve’ybody is done his do, de inner guard will please count de remains,” Hitch announced.
Figger Bush advanced and separated the silver in neat little piles. A minute later he announced the result:
The lodge received this statement in gloomy silence. Green Trapps sat down, took the college diploma out of his pocket and unrolled it. The sight of that precious document almost brought the tears to Vinegar’s eyes.
It was a long time before a suggestion was offered, but finally Pap Curtain spoke:
“Brudders, I’s powerful sorry dat we couldn’t make de riffle an’ fix Vinegar up right. But dese here is hard times fer niggers an’ cash money is scarce. But I rejoices dat we is raised as much as we has. Now I makes dis motion: Vinegar is been bawlin’ fer a readin’ lamp an’ a pulpit settee fer a long time. Less take dis cash money an’ ease down Vinegar’s feelin’s a little by buyin’ him de lamp an’ de settee.”