_Bobby_. Y-yes, father. Should you think Mr. Fawcepps will have one of those?
_The I.P._ (_annoyed_). Now, what _is_ the use of my taking you to a place of this sort to divert your thoughts, if your mind is running on something else all the time? I won't have it, do you hear. Enjoy yourself like a sensible boy!
_Bobby_. Y-yes, Father, I am. It--it's quite cured my toothache already--_really_ it has!
_Mrs. Frivell_ (_reading from Catalogue_). "A Penitent's Girdle, made of barbed wire, which, when worn next to the flesh, caused the most unpleasant and uncomfortable irritation." Oh, FREDERIC, just fancy that!
_Mr. F._ My dear CECILIA, I can _quite_ fancy it!
_Mrs. F._ But I thought these tortures were only for _Malefactors_. Why do they call it a _Penitent's_ Girdle?
_Mr. F._ Can't say,--unless because he generally repented having put it on.
_Mrs. F._ I don't think that _can_ be the real reason.
_Two English House-maids_ (_to a small German Page-Boy who is escorting them_). Here, JOHNNIE, what's _this_ mean? (_Reads from Catalogue the motto on an Executioner's Sword._) "Di Herrin' sturin dem Unheel ick exequire ir End Urthile." Come, _you_ ought to know!
_Johnnie_ (_not unnaturally at a loss_). It means--it means--somding I do not understandt.
_The Housemaids_ (_disappointed in him_). Well, you _are_ a boy! I _did_ think, bein' German yourself, you'd be quite at _'ome_ 'ere!
_Mr. Ernest Stodgely_ (_impressively, to Miss FEATHERHEAD, his fiancée_). Just look at this, FLOSSIE. (_Reading._) "Executioner's Cloak, very long, of red woollen material; presumably red so as not to show blood-spots or stains." Hideously suggestive that, is it not?
_Miss Flossie._ I shouldn't call it exactly _hideous_, ERNEST. Do you know, I was just thinking that, with a high Astrachan collar, you know, and old silver fastenings, it would make rather a nice winter cloak. So deliciously warm! [_ERNEST avails himself of a lover's privileges to lecture her severely._
_Mr. Ch. Goole._ So _this_ is the Iron Maiden! Well, I expected something rather more dreadful-looking. The face has really quite a pleasant expression. [_Disappointedly._
[Illustration: "Oh, but I think that makes it so much _more_ horrible, don't you?"]