Prejudice iz a hous plant which is very apt tew wither if yu take it out doors amungst pholks.
The devil holds poor kards, but he plays them mighty well.
What iz the next wust thing tew lieing? Gitting ketched at it.
I am so phully aware ov the uncertainty ov the law, that if a man whom i had never seen nor heard ov should su me for a _debt_ ov one hundred dollars, and i couldn't kompound with him for fifty, i would pay the whole rather than defend the suit.
I hav noticed this diffrence between people--thare is _some_ who are not az big phools as they look.
Most authors in writing neglekt their punktuashuns, espeshliy the _full stop_.
I hav seen pholks so melankolly and so gloomy that they wouldn't admit thare waz a brite side tew ennything in this world, not even tew a nu haff dollar.
If wit forms the blade, good sense should be the handle and benevolence the skabbard ov the sword.
Experience iz knowledge, and it will stik bi a phellow like the money he gits by hard knoxs.
I never hav seen a bigot yet but what had a small and apparently braneless hed--but i hain't seen all the bigots, yu know.
Silence iz like darkness, a good place tew hide.
Thare iz no revenge so komplete az forgivness.
He that desires tew be ritch only to be charitable, iz not only a wize man, but a good one.
Grate welth, in our journey thru life, iz only extra baggage, and wants a heap ov watching.
The malice ov the world ain't haff so dangerous az its flatterys.
If i feel that i am right, all the kurs in the country may snap at mi heels.
Trieing tew satisfy our desires with wealth iz like trieing tew stop up a rat hole with sand--the rats will soon dig out sum whare else.
A piece ov satire, tew be beneficial, should be so rendered that every man who reads, or hears it, shall say to himself, "That iz just, bekauze it hits every boddy but me."
Skandle iz az ketching az the small pox, and perhaps thare iz but one real preventative, and that iz--tew be vacksinated with deaf and dumbness.
Really wize men pay but little attenshun to misterys, but one good mistery will furnish a dozen phools with vittles and drink for a year, and fat the whole ov them besides.
We are all ov us too apt tew judge ov a sin by its size. We will pass a 10 cent counterfit shin plaster, when we would shudder at a 10 dollar bill.