LANCIOTTO. You have indeed; nor do I wonder, Pepe. Fool as you are, I promise you success In your new calling, if you'll set it up. The thing is far too simple.
PEPE. At that alarm, All Rimini leaped up upon its feet. Cousin, your bridal-train. You groan! 'Ods wounds! Here is the bridegroom sorely malcontent-- The sole sad face in Rimini. Since morn, A quiet man could hardly walk the streets, For flowers and streamers. All the town is gay. Perhaps 'tis merry o'er your misery.
LANCIOTTO. Perhaps; but that it knows not.
PEPE. Yes, it does: It knows that when a man's about to wed, He's ripe to laugh at. Cousin, tell me, now, Why is Paolo on the way so long? Ravenna's but eight leagues from Rimini--
LANCIOTTO. That's just the measure of your tongue, good fool. You trouble me. I've had enough of you-- Begone!
PEPE. I'm going; but you see I limp. Have pity on a cripple, gentle Count. [_Limps._
PEPE. A miracle, a miracle! See, see, my lord, at Pepe's saintly name The lame jog on.
PEPE. If he were mine, I'd go-- That's a good boy! [_Pats_ LANCIOTTO'S _back._
LANCIOTTO. [_Starting._] Hands off! you'll rue it else! [_Exit._
PEPE. [Laughing.] Ha! ha! I laid my hand upon his hump! Heavens, how he squirmed! And what a wish I had To cry, Ho! camel! leap upon his back, And ride him to the devil! So, we've had A pleasant flitting round philosophy! The Count and Fool bumped heads, and struck ideas Out by the contact! Quite a pleasant talk-- A friendly conversation, nothing more-- 'Twixt nobleman and jester. Ho! my bird, I can toss lures as high as any man. So, I amuse you with my harmless wit? Pepe's your friend now--you can trust in him-- An honest, simple fool! Just try it once, You ugly, misbegotten clod of dirt! Ay, but the hump--the touch upon the hump-- The start and wriggle--that was rare! Ha! ha!
_The Same. The Grand Square before the Castle. SOLDIERS on guard, with banners, etc._ CITIZENS, _in holiday dresses, cross the scene. The houses are hung with trophies, banners, garlands, etc. Enter_ MALATESTA, _with_ GUARDS, ATTENDANTS, _etc._
MALATESTA. Captain, take care the streets be not choked up By the rude rabble. Send to Cæsar's bridge A strong detachment of your men, and clear The way before them. See that nothing check The bride's first entrance into Rimini. Station your veterans in the front. Count Guido Comes with his daughter, and his eyes are sharp. Keep up a show of strength before him, sir; And set some labourers to work upon The broken bastion. Make all things look bright; As if we stood in eager readiness, And high condition, to begin a war.