Before we commence with the dialogue of the play, we must mention one very important part of the exhibition. As Mr. Punch's voice is, at the best of times, rather husky, it is necessary that the exhibitor should have a colleague or interpreter among the audience who knows the play by heart, and who, from practice, can understand what Mr. Punch says better than the audience. This person must repeat after Punch whatever he may say, only not to wound his feelings; he must do so in the form of questions--for example, suppose Mr. Punch says, "Oh! I've got such a pretty baby!" the showman outside must repeat: "Oh! you've got a pretty baby, Mr. Punch, have you? Where is she?" The outside showman ought to have some instrument to play on--a tin tea-tray or tin pan will do--and if there is any one to accompany him on the piano when Mr. Punch sings a song or dances, so much the better. Now for the play.

Mr. Punch makes his _début_ by dancing round his small stage in an extravagant and insane manner, singing some rollicking song in his own peculiar style. Having indulged himself in this way for a few seconds, he pulls up suddenly, and looking over the edge of the screen at the showman outside, exclaims:

The Art of Amusing — Part 17

_Showman._ "I say, 'old hoss!' Mr. Punch, that's not a very polite way to address a gentleman. Well, what do you say?"

The Art of Amusing — Part 17

_S._ "Well, you've said 'I say!' twice before. What is it you have to say?"

The Art of Amusing — Part 17

Mr. Punch dances off, hilariously singing.

_S._ "Nothing particular! Well, that is a valuable communication."

_P._ (Stopping again). "Oh, you April fool!"

_S._ "April fool? No, Mr. Punch, I'm not an April fool. This isn't the first of April."

_P._ "Isn't it? Well, salt it down till next year."

_S._ "Salt it down till next year? No, thankee, Mr. Punch. Guess you'll want it for your own use."

_S._ "Such a pretty creature, eh? Well, I'd like to be introduced."

_P._ "She's such a beauty! She's got a nose just like mine" (touching his snout with his little hand).

_S._ "Got a nose just like yours, eh? Well, then, she must be a beauty."

_P._ "She's not quite so beautiful as me, though."

_S._ "Not so beautiful as you? No, of course not, Mr. Punch; we couldn't expect that."

_P._ "You're a very nice man. I like you."