_Adolphus._ "That is precisely what I want to arrive at. I am in the dry-goods business, than which there is no higher social position in the world. I am not rich, but I expect to be. Of my personal appearance you can form a more just and adequate opinion than any language of mine could convey. In other words, I am more easily conceived than described. Now, the question is, whether you will accept my hand and heart."
_Adolphus._ "Most charming little pippetsy poppetsy; let me embrace those virgin lips."
_Lady C._ "Oh, lor! Now wait a minute." (Turns her head away bashfully, and puts up her umbrella. Both parties retire behind the umbrella, when a loud smack is heard--such a smack as has been compared to the noise produced by a horse dragging his foot out of a mud-hole. Then both strike an attitude with the umbrella between them, and the curtain descends in a blaze of red light.)
Now if this is not a simple way of building a drama, we are no judge.
Our adjoining illustration represents the interview between General Hab-grabemall and the lady. The General acquires a gigantic appearance by tying a folded shawl or small pillow on each shoulder before he puts on his cloak; his face is made up chiefly of curled hair and diachylon. Reginald Spooneigh has long flaxen hair, made out of some rope unravelled for the purpose, and sewed on to a tightly-fitting cap, moustache and beard to match, and turn-down collar. The rest of his attire may be in any style most convenient.
Mr. Tinkletop is remarkable for a red nose, turned up, and one tooth missing (both according to our prescription given in a previous chapter). His vest and cravat are of bright colors, and his coat also, if possible.
[Illustration: PRIVATE THEATRICALS.--_See page 80._]