In October 1806 he gave this sad account to his daughter:
MY DEAR CHILD,--This being the first year's anniversary of my marriage, from what I wrote two months after it, you will be curious to know how things stand at present. I am sorry to say that experience only serves to confirm me in the belief that in character and natural propensities Madame de Rumford and myself are totally unlike, and never ought to have thought of marrying. We are, besides, both too independent, both in our sentiments and habits of life, to live peaceably together--she having been mistress all her days of her actions, and I, with no less liberty, leading for the most part the life of a bachelor. Very likely she is as much disaffected towards me as I am towards her. Little it matters with me, but I call her a female dragon--simply by that gentle name! We have got to the pitch of my insisting on one thing and she on another.
It is possible that, had the war ceased raging, and had we gone into Italy, where she is dying to go, and with me too, she having heard me speak much of the delights of that country, she having been very happy, too, in travelling with me in Switzerland, it might have suspended difficulties, but never have effected a cure. That is out of the question. Indeed, I have not the least idea of continuing here, and, if possible, still less the wish, and am only planning in my mind what steps I shall take next--to be hoped more to my advantage. Communication with England is prohibited, and it makes me sad.
I can do no more, my dear Sally, than simply give you the latest news upon this the anniversary of my marriage, for I am still here, and so far from things getting better they become worse every day. We are more violent and more open, and more public, as may really be said, in our quarrels. If she does not mind publicity, for a certainty I shall not. As I write the uncouth word _quarrels_, I will give you an idea of one of them.
In the first place be it known that this estate is a joint concern. I have as good a right to it as Madame, she having paid rather more in the beginning, but I an immensity of money in repairs and alterations, &c. &c., besides a great deal of my own time and care spent while we have been here.