There's a story that's old, But good if twice told, Of a doctor of limited skill, Who cured beast and man On the " cold-water plan," Without the small help of a pill.

On his portal of pine

Hung an elegant sign, Depicting a beautiful rill,

Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems/Pat's Criticism

And a lake where a sprite, With apparent delight, Was sporting in sweet dishabille.

Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems/Pat's Criticism

Pat McCarty one day, As he sauntered that way, Stood and gazed at that portal of pine; When the doctor with pride Stepped up to his side, Saying, "Pat, how is that for a sign ? "

Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems/Pat's Criticism

"There's wan thing," says Pat, "Ye've lift out o' that, Which, be jabers! is quoite a mistake: It's trim, and it's nate; But, to make it complate, Ye shud have a foine burd on the lake."

"All! indeed! pray, then, tell, To make it look well, What bird do you think it may lack?" Says Pat, "Of the same I've forgotten the name, But the song that he sings is 'Quack - quack!'"