_The Scene is the Reception Room at Miss Dyott's seminary for young ladies, known as Volumnia College, Volumnia House, near Portland Place. The windows look on to the street, and a large door at the further end of the room opens to the hall, where there are some portmanteaus standing, while there is another door on the spectator's right. Jane Chipman, a stout, middle-aged servant, and Tyler, an unhealthy looking youth, wearing a page's jacket, enter the room, carrying between them a large travelling-trunk._
[_Breathlessly._] 'Old 'ard--'old 'ard! Phew! [_They rest the trunk on the floor, Tyler dabs his forehead with a small dirty handkerchief, which he passes on to Jane._] Excuse me not offering it to you first, Jane.
[_Dabbing the palms of her hands._] Don't name it, Tyler. Do you 'appen to know what time Missus starts?
It's a queer thing her going away like this alone--not to say nothing of a schoolmistress leaving a lot of foolish young gals for a month or six weeks.
[_Sitting despondently on the trunk._] Cook and the parlourmaid got rid of too--it's not much of a Christmas vacation we shall get, you and me, Jane.
You're right. [_Sitting on the sofa._] Let's see--how many of our young ladies 'aven't gone home for their 'olidays?
Oh, she ain't got no 'ome. She's a orphan, studying for to be a governess.
Then there's this new girl, Miss Ranklin'.
Yes, Dinah Ranklin'. Now why is _she_ to spend her Exmas at our College? She's the daughter of Admiral Ranklin', and the Ranklin's live jest round the corner at Collin'wood 'Ouse.
Oh, she's been failin' in love or something, and has got to be locked up.
Well then, last but not least, there's the individual who is kicking his 'eels about the 'ouse, and giving himself the airs of the 'aughty.
[_Mysteriously._] What--Missus's husband?
Ah! Mark my word, if ever there was a mystery, there's one.
_Who_ is he? Missus brings him 'ome about a month ago, and doesn't introduce him to us or to nobody. The order is she's still to be called Miss Dyott, and we don't know even his nasty name.
[_Returning to the trunk._] She calls him Ducky.
Yes, but _we_ can't call him Ducky. [_Pointing to the handkerchief which Jane has left upon the sofa_] My 'andkerchief, please. I don't let _anybody_ use it.