"Your Petitioners therefore pray your Honourable House to protect '_their native industry_'--by keeping the doors of the Crystal Palace and its gardens closed against the working classes of London."
THE CABMAN AND HIS PINT OF STOUT.--A FABLE.
A Cabman, being inclined to drink, stepped into a public-house, and asked for a pint of stout, which he swallowed at a draught, and in payment for the liquor laid down a fourpenny piece. The landlord, who chanced to be serving in the bar, being a wag, called after his customer, as the latter was going, "Hi there, you!" to which the other, turning his head, replied, "Halloa!"--"Come, I say!" pursued mine host, "this here won't do!"--"Wot won't do?" demanded the other.--"Wot?" the landlord repeated; "wot's this here?"--"Wot's this here?" returned the cabman; "why, it's a fo'p'ny bit, isn't it?"--"Well, and wot then?" cried the landlord.--"Wot dy'e mean?" retorted the cabman.--"Wot do you mean?" rejoined the landlord; "wot dy'e mean this here for?"--"For a pint o' stout, to be sure," was the cabman's answer.--"Ho, ho, ho, ho!" shouted the landlord.--"Wot are yer larfin' at?" exclaimed the cabman, in astonishment; "Fo'pence a pint o' stout--ain't that right!"--"I s'pose," replied the landlord, "yer calls yerself a gentleman."
Here the people who were tippling at the bar burst into a loud laugh, which awoke the cabman to a perception that the landlord had been making game of him. "Come, come," said Boniface, "I was only chaffin' you; but now I hope you'll see the propriety of takin' wot you're entitled to when you're offered it, without indulgin' in superfluous and unpleasant hobservations."
MR. PUNCH has received a letter, written in a bold feminine style, and sealed with a crest, a hand-and-patten--a letter, of which the subjoined are the contents:--
"At the present moment, when everything is rising, it behoves the Wives of England to be up and doing too. There are thousands--perhaps millions of my oppressed sisters this minute married to husbands in the human form who, with a meanness which ought to make them ashamed of themselves, allow so much and _no more_ for the expenses of the house. No matter what are the markets--the weekly allowance is the same. Bread may rise--butter may go up--legs of mutton may advance--and still no rise at home!