But 'ang it, I'm preaching, old oyster, and giving them Rads the straight tip. One thing, they won't take it, this lot won't; they ain't got no savvy, no grip. Bin sloppin' all over the place like, a-fillin' their cup, and that rot, And now, arter tackling the pewter, they find as they've all gone to pot.
O ain't it ske-rumptious, my pippin? I feel I could washup Brum JOE, And I'm bound to admit, next to Bung, us true Tories must thank _him_ this go. He's crumped 'is old pals a fair knock-out. If SOLSBURY'S saddle 'e'll carry, And run straight in 'arness with ARTHUR, _'e_'ll do! Yours, tolbobbishly,
NOT THE ONLY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THEM.--Lord ROSEBERY the Derby Winner; Sir W. V. HARCOURT the Derby Loser.
_She_ (_giving him a flower_). "SWEET AS THE GIVER?"
_He_ (_wishing to be very complimentary indeed_). "OH--SWEETER FAR!"]
(_A Reminiscence of the Recent Elections._)
SCENE--_The corner of Northumberland Avenue, opposite the National Liberal Club, where a screen is erected, on which the latest results of the second day's pollings, together with photographs of prominent Liberal politicians, and scathing caricatures of Unionist leaders, are being exhibited by a magic lantern for the benefit of a large and good-humoured crowd. The sympathies of the majority are, as might perhaps be expected, with the winning side, but the minority is very fairly represented, while in "booing" and "brayvo"-ing they are incontestably the stronger party._ TIME--_Between 10 P.M. and 12.30 A.M._
_Spectators_ (_as the portrait of_ Sir WILLIAM HARCOURT _is displayed_). Yah! Tike 'im down! 'Ow about Durby?... Brayvo!... Three cheers fur 'AR-COURT! 'E'll come back yet! (_Lord_ ROSEBERY'S _likeness follows_.) Good ole _Ladas!_ Cheer up! Put a _smile_ on 'im!
[Mr. GLADSTONE'S _face, leonine and benignant, is next shown_.
_A Chivalrous Conservative_ (_magnanimously_). 'E's a grand old chap, any'ow; _I_ ain't goin' to chevy 'im.
[_Which, to the credit of the assembly, seems to be the general sentiment, as conveyed by unanimous applause._
_A Sanguine Radical._ We shall 'ave the results in soon now; it's past ten. We shall do better to-day than what we did Saturday, you _see_.... Ah, here's the first--"Hereford. Unionist Majority, 313. No change." You can't _expeck_ none in a rotten place like that! You _wait_ a bit.... "Croydon. Increased Unionist majority of 835. No change." Well, 'UTCHINSON done very well; it's a strong Tory seat, is Croydon. They're on'y 'olding their own so far--that's all.