“Have I?” inquired my friend innocently, addressing the fishmonger.
“Of course not,” he replied. “You bought and paid for it an hour ago.”
“Sold again!” cried my friend, turning to the policeman; and the crowd, to whom the joke now became apparent, roared with laughter; while the officer walked away in high dudgeon, muttering under his breath things that cannot be set down in print.
As a matter of fact my friend had purchased the lobster, at the same time telling the fishmonger that he need not wrap it up for him. “Leave it on the slab where it is,” he remarked as he handed over the purchase money, “and I’ll call for it presently, and take it away just as it is.”
Bound for Cape Town--A pleasant voyage--Ships’ games--A contrast in voyages--“Cock-fighting” at sea--“Chalking the Pig’s Eye”--“Swinging the Monkey”--Marine cricket--A new kind of golf--Cycling at sea--Sweepstakes on the vessel’s run --Races on the ocean wave--Mock breach-of-promise trials-- By bullock waggon to Kimberley--I perform before Cecil Rhodes --Get shot in a street row--Contrast on my second visit-- The great strike riots in Johannesburg--Fire and dynamite-- A night of horror--A gay but expensive city--Dear drinks-- Performing in the back veldt--Eggs for throwing--At Pretoria --Kruger’s house--Where Winston Churchill swam the river--A disappointing stream--My prize giant--A Jo’burg sensation-- Buying a forty-shilling suit to measure--A disgusted tailor-- Special railway travelling--My giant proves his agility--In Colombo--Indian fakirs--Their conjuring skill overrated--The boy and rope trick--Two versions of a similar story--The whole thing a fake--The evidence of H.H. the Maharajah of Jodhpur--I offer £100 to any native who can do it--No takers--The mango seed trick--Outwitting a fakir--“Let me plant the seed”--The camera in action--The Tree of Life--Cobra and mongoose fight.
The voyage out to South Africa is an exceedingly pleasant one. The passengers invariably settle down soon after leaving Madeira into a sort of happy family party, and all kinds of games and sports peculiar to ship-board are entered into with zest.
To a certain degree, of course, this is true of all ocean voyages. Going out to America on the _Mauretania_, for instance, we played all the usual ships’ games, and I recollect that I won everything, with the exception of the pillow fight. Indeed, as regards the blindfold games, such as, for example, “Chalking the Pig’s Eye,” I was bound to win; for a reason I shall explain later. But then, of course, I never claimed the prize for these, but always let it go to the second best, or put it up for competition over again.