SEM. Tush, sir, be merry, let pass away the mare:[33] How say you, have I not hied me lightly? Here is your chair and lute to make you merry. CAL. Merry, quotha? nay, that will not be; But I must needs sit for very feebleness. Give me my lute, and thou shalt see How I shall sing mine unhappiness. This lute is out of tune now, as I guess; Alas! in tune how should I set it, When all harmony to me discordeth each whit, As he, to whose will reason is unruly? For I feel sharp needles within my breast; Peace, war, truth, hatred, and injury: Hope and suspect, and all in one chest. SEM. Behold, Nero, in the love of Poppaea[34] oppressed, Rome how he brent; old and young wept: But she took no thought, nor never the less slept. CAL. Greater is my fire, and less pity showed me. SEM. I will not mock; this fool is a lover. [_Aside_. CAL. What say'st thou? SEM. I say, how can that fire be, That tormenteth but one living man, greater Than that fire that brenneth a whole city here, And all the people therein? CAL. Marry, for that fire is greatest, That brenneth very sore, and lasteth longest; And greater is the fire that brenneth one soul, Than that which brenneth an hundred bodies. SEM. His saying in this none can control. [_Aside_. CAL. None but such as list to make lies! And if the fire of purgatory bren in such wise, I had liever my spirit in brute beasts should be, Than to go thither, and then to the deity. SEM. Marry, sir, that is a spice of heresy. CAL. Why so? SEM. For ye speak like no Christian man. CAL. I would thou knewest Melibaea worship I: In her I believe, and her I love. SEM. Ah, ah, then, With thee Melibaea is a great woman; I know on which foot thou dost halt on: I shall shortly heal thee, my life thereupon! CAL. An incredible thing thou dost promise me. SEM. Nay, nay, it is easy enough to do; But first, for to heal a man, knowledge must be Of the sickness; then to give counsel thereto. CAL. What counsel can rule him, Sempronio, That keepeth in him no order of counsel?[35] SEM. Ah, is this Calisto? his fire now I know well; How that love over him hath cast her net; In whose perseverance is all inconstancy. CAL. Why, is not Elisaeus' love and thine met? SEM. What then? CAL. Why reprovest me then of ignorance? SEM. For thou settest man's dignity in obeisance To the imperfection of the weak woman. CAL. A woman? Nay, a god of goddesses. SEM. Believest that then? CAL. Yea, and as a goddess I here confess; And I believe there is no such sovereign In heaven, though she be in earth. SEM. Peace, peace. A woman a god! nay, to God, a villain. Of your saying ye may be sorry. CAL. It is plain. SEM. Why so? CAL. Because I love her, and think surely To obtain my desire I am unworthy. SEM. O fearful heart! why comparest thou with Nimrod Or Alexander? of this world not lords only, But worthy to subdue heaven, as saying go'th; And thou reputest thyself more high Than them both, and despairest so cowardly To win a woman, of whom hath been so many Gotten and ungotten, never heard of any? It is recited in the Feast of Saint John: This is the woman of ancient malice; Of whom but of a woman was it sung on, That Adam was expulsed from Paradise? She put man to pain whom Eli did despise. CAL. Then sith Adam gave him to their governance, Am I greater than Adam myself to advance? SEM. Nay, but of those men it were wisdom, That overcame them to seek remedy, And not of those that they did overcome. Flee from their beginnings, eschew their folly: Thou knowest they do evil things many. They keep no mean, but rigour of intention; Be it fair [or] foul, wilful without reason. Keep them never so close, they will be showed, Give tokens of love by many subtle ways: Seeming to be sheep, and serpently shrewd: Craft in them renewing, that never decays. Their sayings and sightings provoking their plays. Oh, what pain is to fulfil their appetites, And to accomplish their wanton delights! It is a wonder to see their dissembling, Their flattering countenance, their ingratitude, Inconstancy, false witness, feigned weeping: Their vain-glory, and how they can delude: Their foolishness, their jangling not mew'd: Their lecherous lust and vileness therefore: Witchcrafts and charms to make men to their lore: Their embalming[36] and their unshamefacedness: Their bawdry, their subtlety, and fresh attiring! What trimming, what painting, to make fairness! Their false intents and flickering smiling: Therefore lo! it is an old saying That women be the devil's nets, and head of sin; And man's misery in Paradise did begin-- CAL. But what thinkest thou by me yet for all this? SEM.