LEGAL ADVICE UNDER SINGULAR CIRCUMSTANCES.--215.
A client, while bathing in the sea, saw his lawyer rise up, after a long dive, at his side. "Ho, there Mr. ----, have you taken out a warrant against Burt?" "He is in quod," replied the agent, and dived again, showing his heels as a parting view to his client; nor did the latter hear more of the interview with the shark until he got his account, containing the entry, "To consultation at sea, anent the incarceration of Burt, six shillings and eightpence."
Recently the wife of one of the City fathers of New Bedford presented her husband with three children at a birth. The delighted father took his little daughter, four years of age, to see her new relations. She looked at the diminutive little beings a few moments, when, turning to her father, she inquired: "Pa, which one are you going to keep?"
"A capital example," writes a reader, "of what is often termed 'taking the starch out,' happened recently in a country bank in New England. A pompous, well-dressed individual entered the bank, and, addressing the teller, who is something of a wag, inquired: 'Is the cashier in?' 'No, sir,' was the reply. 'Well, I am dealing in pens--supplying the New England banks pretty largely--and I suppose it will be proper for me to deal with the cashier.' 'I suppose it will,' said the teller. 'Very well; I will wait.' The pen-pedlar took a chair, and sat composedly for a full hour, waiting for the cashier. By that time, he began to grow uneasy, but sat twisting in his chair for about twenty minutes, and, seeing no prospect of a change in his circumstances, asked the teller how soon the cashier would be in. 'Well, I don't know exactly,' said the waggish teller, 'but I expect him in about eight weeks. He has just gone to Lake Superior, and told me he thought he should come back in that time.' Pedlar thought he would not wait. 'Oh, stay if you wish,' said the teller, very blandly; 'we have no objection to your sitting here in the day time, and you can probably find some place in town where they will be glad to keep you of nights.' The pompous pedlar disappeared without another word."
One of the late Governors of South Carolina was a splendid lawyer, and could talk a jury out of their seven senses. He was especially noted for success in criminal cases, almost always clearing his client. He was once counsel for a man accused of horse-stealing. He made a long, eloquent, and touching speech. The jury retired, but returned in a few moments, and proclaimed the man not guilty. An old acquaintance stepped up to the prisoner, and said: "Jem, the danger is passed; and now, honour bright, didn't you steal that horse?" To which Jem replied: "Well, Tom, I've all along thought I took the horse; but since I've heard the Governor's speech, I don't believe I did."