“Oh, I didn’t come in, so there’s an end of it! I’ll take supper now and go to bed.”
She sipped the glass of warm milk silently, and then together they went to bed. How cold it was in the corridor. How ill lit and melancholy it appeared And Rosalie lay awake, with burning tears, which were never shed, in her eyes.
Three years! And Mr. Barringcourt had said a woman of brains or spirit would have forestalled them and have escaped.
And then it seemed as if across the silence there came that clear, pure voice that spoke to her before, after her aunt was dead: “Neither brains nor spirit, but the path directed.”
And silence and sleep and comfort fell—night’s gentle curtain and soft pillow for all weary heads.
Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, long or short, according to the circumstance. Each resembled some long and silent eternity of Nothingness. Here was nothing to do. Mariana said there was nothing, and she knew best.
But she shook her head. “I cannot bring it from the workroom.”
“There is nothing. Each has her work; for you there is none.”
“Mr. Barringcourt has the key to the library. I can ask him for one if you like.”
But Rosalie shook her head. “No, thank you.”
And how difficult she found meal-times, when she must force down food against all wish and inclination. Sunday and Monday it was managed fairly well, but on the Tuesday at dinner-time Rosalie recognised the task was quite beyond her.
“All this tastes of cobwebs and damp soil,” she said. “If I must have one, give me one of those little lozenges you offered me the other day.”
It was brought. She took it with a glass of water, then rose from her seat. When she got to the door she turned round. Her pretty eyebrows were slightly raised, and she laughed.
“That was essence of cobweb, I believe. Thank you; I feel better already for it.”
All was lost upon the youth; he bowed gravely, and returned no answer, and Rosalie went away.
Up and down! Up and down the long dim corridor she walked, with nothing to do but think or mope, or grow melancholy through despair.
After tea Rosalie did not venture out beyond the sitting-room, for the old fear of the darkness had returned; and moreover, to-night a strange weariness oppressed her. At last she fell asleep. Her head rested on the table, and she slept there for nearly an hour.