vulnus _Sternkopf_, _Leo_: voluntas _MSS._
brother, who is the most unaffected of persons and most affectionate, is away. Metellus is not a human being, but “sea-shore and airy void and desert waste.”[35] And you whose conversation and advice have so often lightened my load of care and anxiety, who have aided me in my political life, been my confident in my family affairs and shared my conversations and projects—where are you? So utterly am I deserted, that the only moments of repose I have are those which are spent with my wife, my little daughter and darling boy. For my grand and showy friendships bring some public _éclat_, but private satisfaction they have none. And so, when my house has been crowded with the morning _levée_ and I have gone down to the forum amid a throng of friends, I cannot find in the whole company a single man with whom I can jest freely or whisper familiarly. So I look forward with longing to your coming and in fact urge you to hurry: for I have many cares and anxieties, which I fancy would be banished by a single walk and talk in your sympathetic hearing.
However, I will conceal the stings and pricks of my private troubles, and will not entrust them to this letter and an unknown messenger. They are not very grievous—so don’t alarm yourself—but still they are persistent and worrying, and I have no friend’s advice and discussion to lull them to rest. For the State, though there is still life in it, the very cures that have been tried on it, have again and again opened fresh wounds. If I were to give you a brief summary of what has happened since you left, you would certainly exclaim that Rome cannot possibly stand any longer. For it was after your departure, I believe, that the opening scene of the
ut opinor, introitus fuit in causam fabulae Clodianae, in qua ego nactus, ut mihi videbar, locum resecandae libidinis et coercendae iuventutis; vehemens fui et omnes profudi vires animi atque ingenii mei non odio adductus alicuius, sed spe corrigendae et sanandae civitatis. Adflicta res publica est empto constupratoque iudicio. Vide, quae sint postea consecuta. Consul est impositus is nobis, quem nemo praeter nos philosophos aspicere sine suspiritu posset. Quantum hoc vulnus! facto senatus consulto de ambitu, de iudiciis nulla lex perlata, exagitatus senatus, alienati equites Romani. Sic ille annus duo firmamenta rei publicae per me unum constituta evertit; nam et senatus auctoritatem abiecit et ordinum concordiam diiunxit. Instat hic nunc ille annus egregius. Eius initium eius modi fuit, ut anniversaria sacra Iuventatis non committerentur; nam M. Luculli uxorem Memmius suis sacris initiavit; Menelaus aegre id passus divortium fecit. Quamquam ille pastor Idaeus Menelaum solum contempserat, hic noster Paris tam Menelaum quam Agamemnonem liberum non putavit. Est autem C. Herennius quidam tribunus pl., quem tu fortasse ne nosti quidem; tametsi potes nosse, tribulis enim tuus est, et Sextus, pater eius, nummos vobis dividere solebat. Is ad plebem P. Clodium traducit, idemque fert, ut universus populus in campo Martio suffragium de re Clodi ferat. Hunc