Oh dear!--this is a very long morning. I feel such suspense--such anxiety; and poor Sergeant-Major O'Callaghan is quite in a perspiration! He is drinking and smoking down in the kitchen to pass away the time, and if the lawyer don't come soon, the dear man will be quite fuddled. He talks of buying a farm in the country. Well, we shall see; but if the Sergeant thinks that he will make ducks and drakes of my money, he is mistaken. I have not been three times a widow for nothing--I will have it all settled upon myself; that must and shall be, or else--no Sergeant O'Callaghan for me!
So, here you are, Miss. Well, we'll wait till the will is read, and then we shall see who is mistress here.
_Clem._ I am as anxious as you, Mrs Jellybags. You may have wheedled my poor uncle to make the will in your favour; if so, depend upon it, I shall expect nothing from your hands.
_Jel._ I should rather think not, Miss. If I recollect right, you threw the carminative mixture in my face.
_Clem._ And made you blush for the first time in your life.
_Jel._ I shall not blush to slam the door in your face.
_Clem._ Rather than be indebted to you, I would beg my bread from door to door.
_Edw._ My dearest Clementina, I have come to support you on this trying occasion.
_Jel._ And ascertain how matters stand, before you decide upon marrying, I presume, Mr Edward.
_Edw._ Madam, I am above all pecuniary considerations.
_Jel._ So everybody says, when they think themselves sure of money.
_Jel._ Perhaps I do--I certainly do expect to be rewarded for my long and faithful services.
_Clem._ Do not waste words upon her, my dear. You have my solemn promise, nothing shall change my feelings towards you.
_Jel._ That may be; but did it never occur to you, Miss, that the gentleman's feelings might alter?
[_Hands Clementina to a chair on the right, and sits by her._
_Enter Nephews John, Thomas, William, and James, all with white pocket-handkerchiefs in their hand--they take their seats two right and two left._
_Jel._ (_Aside._) Here they all come, like crows that smell carrion. How odious is the selfishness of this world! But here is Mr Gumarabic. How do you do, sir? (_Curtsies with a grave air._)
_Gum._ Very well, I thank you, Mrs Jellybags. Can't say the same of all my patients. Just happened to pass by--thought I would step in and hear the will read--odd, that I should pop in at the time--very odd. Pray, may I ask, my dear Mrs Jellybags, were you present at the making of the will?