Sez I, "That's so; leaves are turned over in Josiah Allen's mind now as long as we've been pardners that has readin' on 'em as strange to me as if they wuz writ in Chinese or Japan."
But then it must be admitted that not to see your wife's face and know whether she's cross-eyed or snub-nosed is tryin'. But they say it is accordin' to the decree of Feng Shui, and therefore they accept it willingly. They have a great variety of good fruit in Canton--some that I never see before--but their vegetables don't taste so good as ours, more stringy and watery, and their eggs they want buried six months before usin' 'em. I believe that sickened me of China as much as anything. But then some folks at home want their game kep' till it hain't fit to eat in my opinion. But eggs! they should be like Cæsar's wife, above suspicion--the idee of eatin' 'em with their shells all blue and spotted with age--the idee!
We wuz all invited one day to dine with a rich Chinaman Robert Strong had got acquainted with in San Francisco. Arvilly didn't want to go, and offered to keep Tommy with her, and the rest of us went. The house wuz surrounded with a high wall, and we entered through a small door in this wall, and went into a large hall openin' on a courtyard. The host met us and we set down on a raised seat covered with red cloth under some big, handsome lanterns that wuz hung over our heads. Servants with their hair braided down their backs and with gay dresses on brought in tea--as good as any I ever drank--and pipes. Josiah whispered to me:
"How be I agoin' to smoke tobacco, Samantha? It will make me sick as death. You know I never smoked anything but a little catnip and mullen for tizik. I wonder if he's got any catnip by him; I'm goin' to ask."
But I kep' him from it, and told him that we could just put the stems in our mouths, and pretend to smoke enough to be polite.
"Hypocrasy," sez Josiah, "don't become a deacon in high standin'. If I pretend to smoke I shall smoke, and take a good pull." And he leaned back and shut his eyes and took his pipe in his hand, and I guess he drawed on it more than he meant to, for he looked bad, sickish and white round his mouth as anything. But we all walked out into the garden pretty soon and he looked resuscitated.