When this was done, she said: “But, you see, it is not madame’s fault that I am troubled.”
“I do not wish,” I said, “to know any secret,--I am a doctor, not a priest,--but if there is anything you can tell me, in which I might be able to help you, you may command me in so far as is possible.” Candidly, I think I was too inquiring in those days.
She smiled wistfully, and replied: “I will think of what you say so kindly, and perhaps, some day soon, I will tell you of such trouble as I have. But, believe me, it is no question of wrong at all, by any one--now. The wrong is over. It is simply that a debt of honour must be satisfied; it concerns my poor dead brother.”
“Are you going to relatives in France?” I asked.
“No; I have no relatives, no near friends. I am alone in the world. My mother I cannot remember; she died when I was very young. My father had riches, but they went before he died. Still, France is home, and I must go there.” She turned her head away to the long wastes of sea.
Little more passed between us. I advised her to come often on deck, and mingle with the passengers; and told her that, when she pleased, I should be glad to do any service that lay in my power. Her last words were that, after we put into Aden, she would possibly take me at my word.
After she had gone, I found myself wondering at my presentiment that Aden was to be associated with critical points in the history of some of us; and from that moment I began to connect Justine Caron with certain events which, I felt sure, were marshalling to an unhappy conclusion. I wondered, too, what part I should play in the development of the comedy, tragedy, or whatever it was to be. In this connection I thought of Belle Treherne, and of how I should appear in her eyes if that little scene with Mrs. Falchion, now always staring me in the face, were rehearsed before her. I came quickly to my feet, with a half-imprecation at myself; and a verse of a crude sea-song was in my ears:
“You can batten down cargo, live and dead, But you can’t put memory out of sight; You can paint the full sails overhead, But you can’t make a black deed white....”
Angry, I said to myself: “It wasn’t a black deed; it was foolish, it was infatuation, it was not right, but it is common to shipboard; and I lost my head, that was all.”