The guest can judge of the nature of the afternoon occasion by the style of the invitation. For a large and formal reception, it is usual to send out some little time in advance engraved cards of generous size. The name of the débutante is placed beneath that of her mother, followed by the statement that they will be at home on such and such a day and hour, at number so-and-so in a certain street. For a smaller and less pretentious occasion, or for a series of teas, the hostess uses her own visiting-cards, on which her daughter’s name may also be engraved. The day or days and hours are sometimes written in and sometimes engraved.
Neither of these forms of invitation requires any answer, except that those who are unable to attend the affair send a visiting-card in time to reach the house the same day or the day after. If there are two hostesses (the débutante and her mother, for instance), a lady should send two cards. A gentleman sometimes sends three, the third being intended for the master of the house. No comments should be written on these. If one desires to express especial regret to a hostess whom one knows fairly well, a note may accompany the visiting-card.
The question is sometimes asked by correspondents, “Is it obligatory to attend a series of teas or receptions to which an invitation has been received?” Courtesy demands that we shall, if possible, go to one of the occasions. Only an intimate friend or a person especially invited would attend all of them. Should one be unable to go, it is not necessary to send cards of acknowledgment until the last of the afternoons. Persons who are in deep mourning, or who are prevented by some other reason from accepting the invitation, sometimes send their cards soon after it is received and so signify their inability to be present.
The proper dress for guests at an afternoon tea or reception is street or reception costume. The latter, according to present fashion, consists of silk, brocade, velvet, or other handsome material if the wearer is a married woman or a single one who is no longer in her first youth. It should not be very light in color nor very showy if it is to be worn in a public conveyance. The woman who appears in a very handsome toilette should take a carriage, since it is in bad taste to make oneself conspicuous in train or trolley-car. Or she may cover up her dress with a long outer garment—called “Cache-misère” by the French. A young girl eschews brocades and other rich fabrics. Her reception costume may be of woolen or silken stuff, but it should preserve the simplicity of style which is at once appropriate and becoming to young people. White gloves are demanded by the present fashion, although some ladies wear black ones, while the shortness of the skirts makes dainty footgear very desirable. It is offending against good taste as well as against common sense, however, to walk through the streets in the wintry season clad in slippers so thin and stockings so transparent that they make the beholder shiver. They look as much out-of-place as heavy furs in the heat of summer.