‘I will see him at once,’ thought I, ‘whatever it may cost me--I will stay beside him for his last few hours of life; and when he carries with him from this world many an evil memory of shame and treachery, ingratitude from me shall not increase the burthen.’ And with this resolve I turned my steps homeward.
At the time of which I write, there was but one motive principle throughout France--‘Terror.’ By the agency of terror and the threat of denunciation was everything carried on, not only in the public departments of the state, but in all the common occurrences of everyday life. Fathers used it towards their children--children towards their parents; mothers coerced their daughters--daughters, in turn, braved the authority of their mothers. The tribunal of public opinion, open to all, scattered its decrees with a reckless cruelty--denying to-day what it had decreed but yesterday, and at last obliterating every trace of ‘right’ or ‘principle’ in a people who now only lived for the passing hour, and who had no faith in the future, even of this world.
Among the very children at play, this horrible doctrine had gained a footing: the tyrant urchin, whose ingenuity enabled him to terrorise, became the master of his playfellows. I was not slow in acquiring the popular education of the period, and soon learned that fear was a ‘Bank’ on which one might draw at will. Already the domineering habit had given to my air and manner all the insolence of seeming power, and, while a mere boy in years, I was a man in all the easy assumption of a certain importance.
It was with a bold and resolute air I entered the restaurant, and calling Boivin aside, said--
‘I have business in the Temple this morning, Boivin; see to it that I shall not be denied admittance.’
‘I am not governor of the gaol,’ grunted Boivin sulkily, ‘nor have I the privilege to pass any one.’
‘But your boys have the entrée; the “rats” (so were they called) are free to pass in and out.’
‘Ay, and I’m responsible for the young rascals, too, and for anything that may be laid to their charge.’
‘And you shall extend this same protection to me, Master Boivin, for one day, at least--nay, my good friend, there’s no use in sulking about it. A certain friend of ours, whose name I need not speak aloud, is little in the habit of being denied anything; are you prepared for the consequence of disobeying his orders?’