_Cape Town._--In a fainting condition. Scarcely able to hold this pen. Became better after eating ----'s Digestible Plum Puddings, sold in tin canisters at 1s. 10d. per pound.
_Rio Janeiro._--Terribly hot and exhausted. I have now been three months continuously in the water, which is certainly a long time. Much amused with a toy called ----'s Mechanical Rabbit.
_Cape Verde Islands._--Almost unconscious from fatigue. However, I can swim more easily after I have drunk a glass or two of ----'s Cabbage Rose Temperance Non-Intoxicating Sherry. It is a most admirable beverage.
_Madeira._--I move with the greatest difficulty, and fear I must be sinking. I obtain great strength from an occasional sip of ----'s "Beef-fibre" (title registered) which seems to me worth twice its weight in gold.
_Dublin._--Have now been in the water continuously for nearly half a year. Too feeble to look at Dublin. I am evidently sinking, and can only keep off a relapse by eating ----'s Patent Vegetable Substitute for Roast Pork.
_Herne Bay._--Returned dead--quite dead! Restored to life by inhaling ----'s Vitality Producer.
N.B.--The above blanks will be filled up with real names. For particulars apply at 85, Fleet Street Advertisement Department.
As stated in the _Daily Telegraph_ of Thursday last, the Russian Censor stamped out _Mr. Punch's_ Cartoon, "From Nile to Neva," and obliterated the verses. The _St. James's Gazette_ suggested that the Cartoon was thus reproduced in Whistlerian fashion. It certainly is a study in black, without any relief whatever. A Black business indeed! Who shall correct the Censor Incensed? Even _Mr. Punch_ himself would be chary about visiting Petersburg, lest he should be "bound in Russia,"--and sent to Siberia.
[Illustration: IMITATION THE SINCEREST FLATTERY.
_(Effects of a Long Session in the House.)_]
WHAT THE TAME RABBIT SAID TO THE GRAND OLD GARDENER.
_(Some way after "Alice in Wonderland.")_
"The work of Major MORANT is headed _Profitable Rabbit Farming. (Laughter.)_ Yes, that is a subject for merriment, probably, on account of its comparative novelty, but it is also a subject of satisfaction, which is akin to merriment, because this rabbit-farming appears to be a very good and promising description of pursuit.... That is the raising of tame rabbits."--_Mr. Gladstone at the Hawarden Floral and Horticultural Society's Show._