"The dancing, in the conventional bullet style, of Miss Sybil Roe, was quite good."--_Wiltshire Times_.
We confess that the bullet style is too fast for us.
"In all the best dress ateliers classic evening gowns are now being exhibited, and in many of these the lines of the corsage closely resemble the draperies to be seen on the Venus de Milo."--_Daily Mail_.
We must go and look at the Venus de Milo's corsage again.
[Several newspapers have been roused to a sense of their duties to their readers by the insurance competition between _The Chronicle_ and _The Mail_. We make a few preliminary announcements of other insurance schemes which are not yet contemplated.]
_VOTES FOR WOMEN_.--A copy of the current issue nailed to your front door insures you absolutely against arson.
_THE STAR_.--All regular subscribers to _The Star_ are insured with the proprietors of _The Daily News_ for £1,000 in the event of being welshed on any race-course.
_THE NATIONAL REVIEW_.--Annual subscribers to _The National Review_ are guaranteed £10,000 in the event of being (a) robbed on the highway by a member of the present Ministry; (b) defrauded by a member of the present Ministry; (c) having house burgled by member of the present Ministry; (d) having pocket picked by member of present Ministry; always excluding any act or acts done by the CHANCELLOR OF THE EXCHEQUER in a strictly official capacity.
_THE CHURCH TIMES_.--All regular subscribers are insured for £500 against excommunication. £1,000 will be paid to the heirs or assigns of any reader who loses his head in a conflict with a Bishop (Deans, Rural Deans, Canons and Archdeacons being excepted from the benefit of this clause in the policy).
_THE ENGLISH REVIEW_.--Poetic contributors are insured for £500 in the event of a prosecution under the Blasphemy Laws.
_THE DAILY EXPRESS_.--You can sleep soundly in your bed, you can sleep soundly in your train, if the current issue of _The Daily Express_ be on your person. All purchasers are insured for £10,000 against any conflagrations or explosions caused by bombs or combustibles dropped from German airships.
_THE BRITISH WEEKLY_.--All readers of _The British Weekly_ are insured for £1,000 in the event of heart-failure caused by shock while reading the thrilling stories provided by SILAS, JOSEPH, TIMOTHY and JEREMIAH HOCKING.