ACT III.--_Scene, the outside of a prison in which_ RENE _is confined. A confederate breaks in and sets it on fire_. RENE _escapes. Curtain_.
YOUNG LADY. "Pa, why did you come here, if you intended to sleep all the time, and never speak a word to me."
PA. "Because, my dear, I am troubled with inability to sleep. Morphine won't help me, but WATTS PHILLIPS will. My physician tells me that he always prescribes one of PHILLIPS'S plays in cases like mine."
COMIC PERSON. "Now here's another one. This will tickle you, for it's first rate. You ought to read the "Drawer," and remember the anecdotes, so that you can repeat them when you're in company. That's the way I get up all the good things I say. O! this is the question I was going to ask you. Said a man, 'Father and mother have I none, but this--'"
ACCOMPANYING FRIEND. (_With great precipitation_.) "Excuse me, but I see a friend in a box whom I must speak to." (_Flies_.)
COMIC PERSON. "Never mind, I'll tell it to the usher the first time he comes this way."
ACT IV.--RENE _is discovered, disguised as a monk_.
RENE. "The hounds of justice dog me. Therefore I will keep in their way until I have seen the lovely niece of the Duchess. She must love me when she learns that I have killed her cousin." _Curtain_.
ONE-HALF OF THE AUDIENCE. "Is that really the whole of the act?"
THE OTHER HALF. "Thank goodness! it really is."
ACT V.--_Scene, the palace of the Duchess. Enter_ RENE _and the_ LOVELY NIECE.
RENE. "The hounds of justice are laying for me just outside the door. Fly with me, my beloved!" (_Enter the_ DUCHESS.)
DUCHESS. "She will not fly if I am at all acquainted with myself. Gyurll, this fellow murdered my son, and I will give him up to justice." (_Enter_ COURT PHYSICIAN.)
COURT PHYSICIAN. "Your Grace is mistaken. True, your son lay dead for a month or two, but by a judicious application of four dozen bottles of my "Universal Hair Restorer and Consumption Cure," he has recovered. Here he comes."
DUCHESS. "'Tis he! 'Tis my son, though rather thin about the legs. RENE, I forgive you. Marry the gyurrll if you wish. Bless you, my children." _Curtain_.
FIRST USHER. "Go round, somebody, and wake the people up. If you don't, they'll sit here and snore all night"