An of a goat-stink damned from armpits fusty one suffer, Or if a crippling gout worthily any one rack, 'Tis that rival o' thine who lief in loves of you meddles, And, by a wondrous fate, gains him the twain of such ills. For that, oft as he ----, so oft that penance be two-fold; 5 Stifles her stench of goat, he too is kilt by his gout.
If ever anyone was deservedly cursed with an atrocious goat-stench from armpits, or if limping gout did justly gnaw one, 'tis thy rival, who occupies himself with your love, and who has stumbled by the marvel of fate on both these ills. For as oft as he swives, so oft is he taken vengeance on by both; she he prostrates by his stink, he is slain by his gout.
Dicebas quondam solum te nosse Catullum, Lesbia, nec prae me velle tenere Iovem. Dilexi tum te non tantum ut volgus amicam, Sed pater ut gnatos diligit et generos. Nunc te cognovi: quare etsi inpensius uror, 5 Multo mi tamen es vilior et levior. Qui potisest? inquis. quod amantem iniuria talis Cogit amare magis, sed bene velle minus.
Wont thou to vaunt whilòme of knowing only Catullus (Lesbia!) nor to prefer Jupiter's self to myself. Then, too, I loved thee well, not as vulgar wretch his mistress But as a father his sons loves and his sons by the law. Now have I learnt thee aright; wherefor though burn I the hotter, 5 Lighter and viler by far thou unto me hast become. "How can this be?" dost ask: 'tis that such injury ever Forces the hotter to love, also the less well to will.
Once thou didst profess to know but Catullus, Lesbia, nor wouldst hold Jove before me. I loved thee then, not only as a churl his mistress, but as a father loves his own sons and sons-in-law. Now I do know thee: wherefore if more strongly I burn, thou art nevertheless to me far viler and of lighter thought. How may this be? thou askest. Because such wrongs drive a lover to greater passion, but to less wishes of welfare.
Desine de quoquam quicquam bene velle mereri Aut aliquem fieri posse putare pium. Omnia sunt ingrata, nihil fecisse benigne _Prodest_, immo etiam taedet obestque magis Vt mihi, quem nemo gravius nec acerbius urget, 5 Quam modo qui me unum atque unicum amicum habuit.
Cease thou of any to hope desirèd boon of well-willing, Or deem any shall prove pious and true to his dues. Waxes the world ingrate, no deed benevolent profits, Nay full oft it irks even offending the more: Such is my case whom none maltreats more grievously bitter, 5 Than does the man that me held one and only to friend.