42. It cannot be less so to help out or forestall the slow speaker, as if you alone were rich in expressions, and he were poor. You may take it for granted, every one is vain enough to think he can talk well, though he may modestly deny it; helping a person out, therefore, in his expressions, is a correction that will stamp the corrector with impudence and ill-manners.
43. Those who contradict others upon all occasions, and make every assertion a matter of dispute, betray by this behaviour an unacquaintance with good-breeding. He, therefore, who wishes to appear amiable, with those he converses with, will be cautious of such expressions as these, "That can't be true, sir." "The affair is as I say." "That must be false, sir." "If what you say is true, &c." You may as well tell a man he lies at once, as thus indirectly impeach his veracity. It is equally as rude to be proving every trifling assertion with a bet or a wager--"I'll bet you fifty of it," and so on. Make it then a constant rule, in matters of no great importance, complaisantly to submit your opinion to that of others; for a victory of this kind often costs a man the loss of a friend.
44. Giving advice unasked, is another piece of rudeness: it is, in effect, declaring ourselves wiser than those to whom we give it; reproaching them with ignorance and inexperience. It is a freedom that ought not to be taken with any common acquaintance, and yet there are these who will be offended, if their advice is not taken. "Such-a-one," say they, "is above being advised. He scorns to listen to my advice;" as if it were not a mark of greater arrogance to expect every one to submit to their opinion, than for a man sometimes to follow his own.
45. There is nothing so unpardonably rude, as a seeming inattention to the person who is speaking to you; tho' you may meet with it in others, by all means avoid it yourself. Some ill-bred people, while others are speaking to them, will, instead of looking at or attending to them, perhaps fix their eyes on the ceiling, or some picture in the room, look out of the window, play with a dog, their watch-chain, or their cane, or probably pick their nails or their noses. Nothing betrays a more trifling mind than this; nor can any thing be a greater affront to the person speaking; it being a tacit declaration, that what he is saying is not worth your attention. Consider with yourself how you would like such treatment, and, I am persuaded, you will never shew it to others.
