"A considerable heap of books, pamphlets, and periodicals, some against, but most of them for, the 'spiritual phenomena,' has been accumulating upon our table, and now looms up large before us, demanding notice. That departed spirits have any thing to do with them is an explanation that we have never been able to accept for one moment. We should as soon think of asserting that an apple, rolling suddenly at our feet, must necessarily have fallen out of heaven, because we could not see the tree it had blown from. To bring such an astounding theory to explain such trivial phenomena is like sending a frigate to pick up a champagne bottle that might be floating down the bay.
"By some of the works before us we are informed, among many other things, that in the other world every man has his name upon his front door; that Swedenborg is a great man, delivers lectures, and _has a street named after him_; that in heaven parties, concerts, and _converzationes_ are frequent; that at some of the concerts, star singers of great celebrity perform, attracting inconceivable multitudes of spirits to hear them; that children take lessons in French and Italian every morning; that the space allotted to some of the spirits is as large as New York; that the 'seventh sphere' (the highest heaven) is about five thousand miles from the earth; that the beds are of roses, and when the spirits recline upon them, the birds sing joyfully around, and mingle their music with the perfume of the flowers; that the celestials (not the Chinese) wear white robes, edged with pink; that a man generally attends his own funeral; that spirits, on their arrival in heaven, are set to studying geology, chemistry, and other dull subjects, which they soon begin to like, and say their daily lessons with an excellent grace; that parchment is in extensive use; that spirits are allowed to visit 'earth' once a day only, and have the privilege of staying one hour; that they have books, rings, newspapers, robin redbreasts, fruit, lakes, streams, diamonds, and drawing masters in the next world. 'Dora's dress,' says one of the revelations, 'was of blue satin, with a white sash; half sleeves, full; a pink velvet ribbon round her throat, fastened by a cameo. Her hair was in curls each side of her face, and fastened in a knot behind.' Dora, be it observed, is a departed _spirit_.