"I cannot tool a tally-ho, I cannot drive a nag; I dare not hold the ribbons On a hack or rumbling drag.
"I could not guide the reins upon A simple billy-goat, And I should hesitate to try To drive a can-al boat.
"But I don't mind these things at all, For I can drive a screw, And I am happy, for that's just What I was meant to do."
[Illustration: "'I SHOULD HESITATE TO TRY TO WRITE A CAN-AL BOAT'"]
"The fourth line of the second verse is weak, but otherwise it's good," commented the Poet. "It's not a _can_-al boat; it's a can-_al_ boat, and all the poetic license in the world wouldn't excuse your taking such a liberty with language."
"I appreciate that," said the Idiot. "But I don't see how I could get around it."
"There's only one way," said the Poet. "I think if you omitted that verse altogether you'd improve the poem."
"Then I should have to eliminate the billy-goat," said the Idiot. "That takes a great deal of humor out of it. I always laugh when I encounter a beast like that in poetry; he seems so helpless when incarcerated in a poem."
"That may be," observed the Poet. "But it is my belief that the goat, of all animals in the kingdom, was the last one designed to be used in poetry, anyhow. He is bad enough in prose, and in this case will butt your poem to oblivion if you insist on keeping him in it. Any more?"
"Well, you've got a good start," said the Poet, rising to light his pipe, which had gone out. "And if I were you I'd go on and finish the book. 'The Idiot's Book of Household Poetry' would have a great sale. It has but one drawback that I can see. You harp on one string too much. Every one of your poems preaches contentment, satisfaction--nothing else."
"That," said the Idiot, "is not an objection, but a virtue; for what other lesson," he added, with a glance of pride at his surroundings, "what other lesson, my dear Poet, should a home try to teach, and what other sentiment can mean so much to mankind?"
[Illustration: "'I HAVEN'T EVER HAD A HOME; I'VE ALWAYS BOARDED'"]
"I don't know," said the Poet, with a little sigh. "I haven't ever had a home; I've always boarded."
Whereupon the Idiot rose up from his chair, and putting his arm about his friend's shoulder, said: