On my way home I met two ladies, attended by a footman who carried a large lantern, by the light of which, I soon distinguished that they were extremely handsome. I therefore accosted them in the most polite manner, and they answered my civilities with considerable vivacity; and, judging from my appearance and dress that I should be an easy prey, they ogled me in such a manner that I could not resist accompanying them farther than I intended; but having come to the corner of a street, they stopped all of a sudden, and one of them said: “Come no farther, I beg. Sir; we are only going to visit a sick lady who resides a few doors up this street. If you have time to wait, we shall be walking home again in about a quarter of an hour, and you may not repent of having met us. You shall hear a song, and the lute played to admiration.” Thus saying, they escaped from me, leaving me so fully persuaded they would keep their promise, that I was fool enough to wait in the street until near midnight. By that time, however, I was but too well convinced that I had been duped, sharp and cunning as I thought myself; and must further confess, to my confusion, that I had not even saved my purse from the dexterity of these accomplished damsels.
Being obliged, on my way to my lodging, to pass the house of my fair widow, I could not refuse myself the pleasure of gazing on it for some time, and I fancied that I perceived a man at the door. I imagined at first that this must be Don Lucio, knowing that he was in the habit of stationing himself near that spot every night, and this thought was accompanied by an emotion mingled with fear and jealousy. Recollecting, however, that he was in prison, I reflected that it could not be him; I grew confident, and, incited by jealousy, advanced towards the object that created it, and who, apparently, more afraid than myself, disappeared at my approach. Having reached the door, I heard the deafened creakings of a bolt, whence I concluded that some one was opening it as quietly as possible. I was not mistaken in my conjecture, for in a moment after, the door was half opened, so as to admit a man. Curiosity to know the bottom of this affair, in which I believed myself to be more interested than I really was, prompted me to slip in as quietly as possible. I immediately felt a hand held out to conduct me, for there was not a glimpse of light in the passage. I thought from the first, that the person mistook me, and could no longer doubt it, when being led into a back parlour, I was rather roughly regaled with a most fervent embrace, seasoned with the fragrant and delightful smell of pepper, garlic and saffron, which convinced me that this transported lover, who was so profuse of her favours, could be no other than the cook. In the midst of her transports, however, she began to suspect, from touching my clothes and face, that I could not be the favoured swain whom she expected; and at length being convinced of her mistake, she suddenly let go her hold of me, and thought to escape; but I held her fast by the petticoat. She exerted all her strength to disengage herself, and I was as determined to detain her, until at length we both fell down with a tremendous crash. This noise awoke two footmen, who lay in an adjoining closet. They jumped instantly out of bed, thinking they heard thieves, and each arming himself with a sword, crept softly with a lamp into the parlour, where they found us stretched at our length on the floor.