This Prince was not very curious, for in the five Years I was in his Court, he scarce ever asked me one Question concerning the _Europeans_; nor was he in one Respect the Bubble of his Favourites, for I never saw him give one Piece of Gold to any of them, even the _Squabbaws_.
The Grandees, who perceived me grow in Favour so far, as that the Jay was turn'd out of Court for his Sawciness to me, which he redoubled after his having been confined, strove who shou'd shew me the most Respect, and make me the greatest Professions of friendship. They not only offer'd me their Purses, but even their Wives and Daughters, whom they often left with me and whose Immodesty has often put me to the Blush. Nay, a _Boutofallalian_, a Title answering to our Duke, told me, if I continued this Shyness, and would not do him the Honour to pass now and then an Hour with his Lady, he shou'd not take me for his Friend; and leaving her with me, he lock'd the Door.
Her Grace was as generous as her Spouse; and when I urg'd the Difference of our Species, she said, she was satisfied that wou'd be no Impediment, by what she had seen, for I had indeed no other Covering than a Mantle, and both his Majesty and his _Squabbaws_ took a Pleasure to teaze me, by pulling it off, and leaving me naked in a full Circle. In short, I was forc'd to save my self by the Window being on a Ground Floor, after all my Excuses were to no Purpose: But fearing the Lady's Resentment, I begg'd the Minister, exaggerating her Husband's Merits, to give him a Pension, and I my self carried and delivered the Grant to her Grace, which made my Peace with both.
One Day, an old Colonel, who was very poor, accosted me in the Emperor's Garden. _My Lord_, said he, _I beg you will vouchsafe me an Audience of Quarter of an Hour; I shall look upon it as the greatest Condescension in you, and as the greatest Honour done me._ I told him he mistook my Title, and gave me one I never did aspire to; but that I was very ready to hear and serve him, for I had seen him often at Court offering Petitions, which were always rejected, and I had a Compassion for him.
"Your Goodness, _said he_, can alone be equalled by your Modesty; give me Leave then to tell you, I have served long and faithfully in the late Wars against the _Owls_ and _Magpyes_, but to my great Surprize, at my Return home; my Regiment, without any Fault alledg'd, was taken from me, and given to a _Valet de Chambre_ who had never seen an Enemy; his Master was a _Boutofallalian_, had a Mind to reward his Pimp, and all that I cou'd say, might as well have been let alone. I had no Estate but what I sold, and gave to a Courtier to get this Regiment, after I had served many Years as a Captain, without the least Blemish in my Character. I have since been in almost a starving Condition, and have wearied my self out with Petitions to no Purpose; for if any, as very few, were received, they were never answered, and perhaps never read. I have therefore no Hopes but what are founded on your Charity: I see it vain to hope for Employment, and shall change my Suit to that of being put into the Hospital of the _Meritorians_ (_which in _English_, signifies disabled and superannuated Soldiers_) I beg your Compassion for a most unfortunate and perishing Man, who has served his Prince and Country with Fidelity, and on several Occasions has distinguish'd himself, as Your Honour will be satisfied, if you will take the Pains to examine these Certificates."