Later in the evening Apollinaris or other sparkling waters may be brought in. The men rejoin the ladies in the drawing-room after a short interval of time. Music, recitations, or other form of entertainment may be given for the amusement of the company. Dancing is now popular at all hours, and people who are fond of cards finish the evening with bridge or some other game. If the hosts have not arranged any after-dinner programme, the guests take their leave about half an hour after the men have returned to the drawing-room. There is no absolute rule about this, as much depends on the lateness of the hour. If some of those present are “going on” to a dance or a reception, they will excuse themselves as soon as they can without appearing brusque or discourteous to their hosts. According to modern rule, a dinner should not last more than an hour and a half. If the guests sit down to table at a quarter-past eight and arise from it at a quarter before ten o’clock, the hour for departure would be somewhere between half-past ten and eleven o’clock. The custom of waiting until the lady who is the guest of honor has taken her leave is growing in favor. This makes it incumbent on her not to linger too long, lest she should inadvertently detain others who desire to go.
One of the most important duties of the diner-out is to talk and to listen to his next-door neighbors. At a small dinner the conversation may become general, but where a great many guests are seated at a large table, this is hardly possible. Some charming talker to whom it would be delightful to listen may sit opposite to you, or two or three places away. If you should yield to the temptation and neglect your dinner-partner, or, still worse, if you should talk across her to the more interesting guest, you would be committing a breach of good manners. At a large and formal dinner, the hostess talks first to the man on her right hand and later to the one on her left. The guests follow her example, turning to speak to the other neighbor soon after she does. This is called “The turning of the table.”
If one has received an invitation to dinner, it is necessary to call in person within one or two weeks after the event. This rule applies to other invitations also, but it is construed with special strictness in the case of a dinner. In New York, with its immense distances, a busy man may be unable to make the “visit of digestion” within a fortnight. In this case he should send his card by mail and call when he can command the time. Men now pay visits in the late afternoon, at five or six o’clock, formal evening calls having gone out of fashion in the large cities.