I dinna suppose that there was a great deal the matter wi' the laird when he went to Tunbridge Wells. Like many others, he wasna weel from having owre little to do. But he had not been there many days, when his fancy was attracted by a dashing young leddy of four or five-and-twenty, the daughter of a gentleman who was a dignitary in the church, but who lived up to, and rather beyond, his income, so that, when he should die, his gay family, of whom he had four daughters, would be left penniless. The name of the laird's intended was Jemima, and she certainly was a pretty woman, and what ye would call a handsome one; but there was a haughtiness about her looks, and a boldness in her carriage, which were far from being becoming in a woman. Her looks and carriage, however, were not her worst fault. She had been taken to the Wells by her mamma, as she termed her mother, for the express purpose of being exhibited--much after the same manner as cattle are exhibited at a fair--to see whether any bachelor or widower would make proposals. Our good laird was smitten, sighed, was accepted, and sealed the marriage contract.
The marriage took place immediately, but he didna arrive at the Ha' wi' his young wife till the following June. When they did arrive, her father, the divine, was wi' them; and, within a week, there was a complete overturning of the whole establishment, from head to foot. They came in two speck-and-span-new carriages, shining like the sun wi' silver ornaments. They brought also a leddy's-maid wi' them, that wore her veils, and her frills, and her fal-de-rals; and the housekeeper declared that, for the first eight days, she didna ken her mistress from the maid; for miss imitated madam, and both took such airs upon themselves, that the auld body was confounded, and curtsied to both without distinction, for fear of making a mistake. They also brought a man-servant wi' them, that couldna speak a word like a Christian, nor utter a word but in some heathenish foreign tongue. Within a week the auld servants were driven about from the right hand to the left, and from the left to the right. The incomers ordered them to do this and to do that, wi' as much insolence and authority as if he had been a lord and she a leddy.