_Sir Pat._ Not one, Madam, from the beginning of the World to the Creation. For I remember there was a Toad brought over there once, and as soon as ever he died. Madam, upon my Honour, they could not bring it to Life again.
_Har._ No! That was very surprizing, ha, ha.
_Sir Pat._ Upon my Word and Honour, Madam, 'tis as true as the Alcorn, for I stood there with these two Eyes and saw it.
_Har._ Then I find you have been in Ireland, Sir?
_Sir Pat._ In Ireland, Madam. (_Aside_--What the Devil have I said. Now I am afraid I have committed a Blunder here.) Yes, Madam, now I remember I was there once about two or three Months ago--I went over with a Lady for my Diversion--She went there to travel so I went to shew her the Country because we were both Strangers in it. But really, Madam, it was so long ago that I quite forgot it, and as I told you before, Madam, I have a very treacherous Heart at remembering Things when once I forgot them.
_Har._ You are to be excused, Sir, for to be sure a Gentleman that has travelled so much as you have done must have a very treacherous Heart at remembering things. For it is common Observation that Travellers always have bad Memories.
_Sir Pat._ O the worst in the World, Madam, for they go into so many Inns and Taverns upon the Road, and into so many Towns and Villages and Steeples and Churches, that it is impossible to Memorandum all the Kingdoms a Man travels through.
_Heart._ Ha, ha, ha. Pray Sir, in your Travels in Ireland, if your heart will let you recollect it, what sort of usage did you meet with?
_Sir Pat._ O the best behaved usage that ever I met with in all the born days of my Life, Sir--I'll tell you what, Madam, now if you were a strange Gentleman and travelling there and happened to come within a Mile of a Gentleman's House when you were benighted so that you could not find your way to it, upon my Honour you might lie there all Night and not cost you a halfpenny, tho' you had never a farthing of Money in your Pocket.
_Heart._ That is very hospitable, I must confess, to let one lie within a Mile of their House.
_Sir Pat._ Lord, Madam, there are not so hospitable and good natured People in the World.
_Heart._ I think, Sir, the Irish are reckoned very great Scholars.