_A Lady of Family._ Oh, yes, I do travel third-class sometimes, my dear. I consider it a duty to try to know something of the lower orders.
[_Looks out for an empty third-class compartment._
_The seats are now all occupied: the Lady of Family is in one corner, next to a Chatty Woman with a basket, and opposite to an Eccentric-looking Man with a flighty manner._
_The Eccentric Man (to the Lady of Family)._ Sorry to disturb you, mum, but you're a-setting on one o' my 'am sandwiches.
_The E. M. (considerately)._ Don't trouble yourself, mum, it's of no intrinsic value. I on'y put it there to keep my seat.
_The Chatty W. (to the L. of F.)._ I think I've seen you about Shinglebeach, 'ave I not?
_The L. of F._ It is very possible. I have been staying with some friends in the neighbourhood.
_The C. W._ It's a nice cheerful place is Shinglebeach; but (_confidentially_) don't you think it's a very sing'ler thing that in a place like that--a fash'nable place, too--there shouldn't be a single 'am an' beef shop?
_The L. of F. (making a desperate effort to throw herself into the question)._ What a very extraordinary thing, to be sure! Dear, _dear_ me! No ham and beef shop!
_The C. W._ It's so indeed, mum; and what's more, as I dare say you've noticed for yourself, if you 'appen to want a snack o' fried fish ever so, there isn't a place you could go to--leastways, at a moment's notice. Now, 'ow do you explain such a thing as that?
_The L. of F. (faintly)._ I'm afraid I can't suggest any explanation.
_A Sententious Man._ Fried fish is very sustaining.
[_Relapses into silence for the remainder of journey._
_The Eccentric Man._ Talking of sustaining, I remember, when we was kids, my father ud bring us home two pennorth o' ches'nuts, and we 'ad 'em boiled, and they'd last us days. (_Sentimentally._) He was a kind man, my father (_to the L. of F., who bows constrainedly_), though you wouldn't ha' thought it, to look at him. I don't say, mind yer, that he wasn't fond of his bit o' booze--(_the L. of F. looks out of window_)--like the best of us. I'm goin' up to prove his will now, I am--if you don't believe me, 'ere's the probate. (_Hands that document round for inspection._) That's all reg'lar enough, I 'ope. (_To the L. of F._) Don't give it back before you've done with it--I'm in no 'urry, and there's good reading in it. (_Points out certain favourite passages with a very dirty forefinger._) Begin there--_that's_ my name.